VINDICATED :)

this is such a glorious feeling! after 4 months of constantly being under fire for i don't know why, i've finally been redeemed of all false blames, accusations & prejudices.

it actually started even way back. there would be snippets of arrogance & slander thrown against me. then, i easily brushed them aside as tactless comments by somebody much much younger. yes, i am about a decade older, but that doesn't make me OLD! i guess if experience was to be the gauge, then i would be a great grandmother by now. but i never saw that as a negative. actually, my past experiences have made me who i am... a STRONG, COMPASSIONATE, HEALED & UNCONDITIONAL LOVING person. if i may say, for me this is what it takes to be a true CHRISTIAN!

but my silence didn't stop her from casting evil on my path. joining a group i have been with for over 3 years now...where i have made so many good friends from breastfeeding counselling, birthday parties, various gatherings, etc...where i even found a good business partner, she continued to broadcast sarcastic remarks obviously pointing in my direction. at first, being the naive person that i am, i thought they were meant for somebody else. but a lot of members have noticed and have shown their concern even during the earlier months.

at one point, after so many destructive broadcasts, she hit below the belt. and even as older sister, i cannot tolerate. i decided to tell my dad, not to gain sides, but to put up a red flag and explain my husband & mine's joint decision to take a step back to cool things off. taking a step back meaning avoid confrontation and let time heal the wounds. after all, being part of a family means i have no choice but to deal with her in the future. an apology letter was sent to me.

but lo and behold, this apology was superceded. wives should be submissive and husbands should be heads of households. but with this move, she made him appear a liar and a subordinate in front of no less than his blood relatives. speaking of barking at the wrong tree huh! ranting and taking pride of past actions and putting up a very thick smokescreen of non-regret, she didn't stop at this and yet broadcasted another message to a public she does not even know. and broadcast is an understatement. the content was full of malicious intent, belligerent lies, massive sarcasm & prejudice not only to me but to others in the same boat. i was not able to read this right away with my very busy schedule. however, after facilitating a support group meeting, i found numerous missed calls and text messages asking how i was. at that point, i was surprised at what could have happened to actually have even those who are not very close to me be concerned. bits & pieces were told to me and since i was still driving, i asked my husband to check what was going on. true enough, even my husband, known for his even temper & kindness, could not take the gravity of this wrongdoing. i had to pray on my way home for guidance in taking the next steps. but definitely, i know that this time, i had to fight! and fight with grace & honor at that.

i decided to respond not to that email but to unveil the person who was hidden under a persona whom she obviously prejudged. my message was simple... "empathy is good but only 1 side has been heard. only He knows which are truths and lies. but everybody should know that i am the w...t... she is referring to and i boldly say so because i have friends there who believe in me more than the lies which were told." simple yet very STRONG! messages of empathy stopped. private support emails & apologies were sent to me, which strengthened my decision to reply. the next day, the moderator called to probe about the matter and spoke with all parties involved. she broadcasted her findings and here i felt total vindication!!! below is her mail (without the names!)

"Hi all,


First my attention was called by a fellow nawie and so I read the emails.

I was shocked and disappointed. But to get to the bottom I need to talk to both Abbie & M.... My initial assesment of the situation is M... is trying to make troubles but I need to be fair also to M... and I need to hear her side before I can conclude. But before I spoke with Melissa, I spoke with Abbie and I also spoke with R... (M... husband; Abbie's Brother). My talk with these two were pleasant and nice. I spoke with M... next and here things arent pleasant anymore. I felt she is trying to trigger Abbie to a catfight; I feel she is trying to get under Abbie's skin. I was ok with allowing her to stay basta maayos and I wil be assured the group wont be used as a venue for her to make potshots at Abbie. I know her issues with Abbie as SIL is very legit and I honestly believe she can find help in the group as such situation is not uncommon here. But consiously or unconsiously she is not trying to pave the way to fix things with Abbie, in fact the effect is otherwise. And when I asked M... about her motives sa emails niya she answered why did Abbie react eh di ibig sabihin guilty siya, for all she knows I am referring to somebody else I didnt write any names nga eh. This is then na I know there is no point in pursuing the talk. The talk was short and we ended up agreeing na she leave the group na lang.

I told R... that I will be emailing the group about this that's why they are cc'd here. If R... would still want to request us to delete all previous email regarding this topic to spare the Family from further embarrassment just let me know and we will do it. If you want to say your piece feel free to email me din privately I will forward it to the group.

Ok I dont care if Abbie's the worst person or worst in law for M... to compel her to send the emails she sent but I appreciate Abbie so much for having the grace to restrain herself in making patol in the group.

I sincerely hope the Family be able to find peace among themselves soon."


peace is an internal state of mind and i don't know about the troublemaker but we are definitely at peace, happy as usual and mindless of world worries, our full faith and trust in HIM. i just pray for my kin, that he may be enlightened and find the right path in these times of darkness. i have nothing but sisterly love for him and have never felt any grudge but always a sincere longing to be closer.